Here's something I came up with in Biology today.
The Skeletal System: Allows you to stand up straight like a Roman should and hold your sword firmly.
The Muscular System: Allows you to deal mighty strokes with your sword and hurl your spear into your enemy (probably the most important system).
Nervous System: Allows you to develop clever battle strategies as well as cunning arguments to gain political power after the war.
Respiratory System: Allows you to give a thundering battle cry and also to deliver a stirring oration after your mighty deeds land you a Senate Seat.
Circulatory System (of your enemy): Bathes your sword in glory!
Integumentary System (of your enemy): A futile effort to keep your sword out. Keep your weapons sharp and your strokes strong to overcome this.
Immune System: Keeps you fit enough for battle.
Digestive System: Allows you to eat a manly meal before battle and drink plenty of strong wine afterwards.
Reproductive System: Allows you to celebrate your victory with your enemy's wife and/or daughter(s).
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